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idaresayihavetoomany:

its-always-funnier-in-enochian:

timelord-castiel:

rosskemp:

do i have cramps or has my appendix exploded

does my boob hurt or am i having a heart attack

am i on my period or do i have internal bleeding

these are our struggles

Thinking of dirty thoughts and getting an erection in awkward situations

The struggles of a man

boo hoo

thinking of my naked grandma isnt going to suck the blood back into my vagina

you need an award right now

sodamnrelatable:

my friend Pete literally makes mercry with his snap stories

this is me, i am pete, love me 

we love you pete

thank you pete

do you ever just

think about how AHS is just Ryan Murphy’s sex fantasies

can-u-not-my-wayward-son:

can-u-not-my-wayward-son:

why is there a huge jug of oregano??? who the fuck puts oregano in brownies?????

i have been informed that it is not oregano but is in fact marijuana
oh

can-u-not-my-wayward-son:

can-u-not-my-wayward-son:

why is there a huge jug of oregano??? who the fuck puts oregano in brownies?????

i have been informed that it is not oregano but is in fact marijuana

oh
cognitivedissonance:

liberalsarecool:

Conservatives playing the “victim card” again. Check off all the prerequisites: wealthy, white, and male.

Ah, yes. The welfare cowboy.

cognitivedissonance:

liberalsarecool:

Conservatives playing the “victim card” again. Check off all the prerequisites: wealthy, white, and male.

Ah, yes. The welfare cowboy.

theacemachine:

susiethemoderator:

teddythemonster:

queenquong:

jeankd:

shanellbklyn:

anti-keiara:

all—blk—everything:

svllywood:

validx2:

Frozen in the hood

how is this the hood. that is clearly a suburbian neighborhood. likeeeeeee can we stop with the casual racism?

Thank you^^^


For real damn smh

She’s probably studied dance for years and is enjoying the snow, but since she’s black…. yah know she MUST be hood. 
God Forbid her name be Rasheeda Jackson. SMH they’ll be making fun all day.

this is how we know “ghetto” and “hood” are synonymous with blackness for white people, no matter what economic class we’re actually in; you will look at us the same way no matter what, so fuck respectability politics and trying to “polite” our way into civil rights

for the fucking comments 

By the way, this “ghetto” girl has a name; it’s Allie.

Allie is clearly a talented dancer

theacemachine:

susiethemoderator:

teddythemonster:

queenquong:

jeankd:

shanellbklyn:

anti-keiara:

all—blk—everything:

svllywood:

validx2:

Frozen in the hood

how is this the hood. that is clearly a suburbian neighborhood. likeeeeeee can we stop with the casual racism?

Thank you^^^

For real damn smh

She’s probably studied dance for years and is enjoying the snow, but since she’s black…. yah know she MUST be hood. 

God Forbid her name be Rasheeda Jackson. SMH they’ll be making fun all day.

this is how we know “ghetto” and “hood” are synonymous with blackness for white people, no matter what economic class we’re actually in; you will look at us the same way no matter what, so fuck respectability politics and trying to “polite” our way into civil rights

for the fucking comments 

By the way, this “ghetto” girl has a name; it’s Allie.

Allie is clearly a talented dancer

accbri:

Monday Funday

I know I’ve said this before, but if you don’t absolutely LOVE Tina Fey and Amy Poehler, we will never, ever, ever, ever be good friends. (Too bad Taylor) Why? Because they broke the comedic glass ceiling, that’s why. With Tina’s edgy jokes and Amy’s bug out personality, no person or topic is safe. They have made it ok for men to think women are funny and ok for women to think some men just aren’t.
Last night was Amy’s night as she FINALLY won a Golden Globe. She deserves about 5 more.
Happy Monday!

theblacksmithsdaughter:

creepyold-kit-hands:

coelasquid:

throughthewildblue:

You cannot buy electronics with food stamps. You cannot buy cigarettes with food stamps. You cannot buy pet food with food stamps. You cannot withdraw money with an EBT card (food stamps).

Do you know what else you can’t buy with food stamps? Shampoo, soap, laundry detergent, toilet paper, paper towels, tissues, tinfoil, plastic sandwich bags, toothpaste, cleaning products, tampons, pads, over the counter medications (such as Tylenol, Ibuprofen, etc.), and anything else you can think of that you cannot physically ingest for nutritional purposes.

Do you know what you can buy with food stamps? Food.

Do you know what it’s like to scrounge for change to buy non-edible necessities, use a credit card and EBT card (food stamps) during the same transaction, and then have the person in line behind you judge you for buying the ingredients to make a birthday cake?

People who disseminate false information about food stamps have never had to use food stamps.

Okay, but let’s talk for a second about how that one lady called turkey “big chicken”

You can’t even buy all food with food stamps. You just… you flat-out can’t buy “food that will be eaten in the store/any food sold for on-premises consumption” or any “hot foods” with food stamps—meaning you can’t buy anything hot, you can’t buy anything that gets blended together, you can’t buy anything “pre-prepared,” in most cases you can’t use your EBT card at restaurants. You literally CANNOT purchase a milkshake with food stamps, because it’s considered “sold for on-premises consumption” (which was ridiculous at the place I worked, because the customer had to mix their own milkshake themself with a little machine we provided them, and several people got upset—rightfully so, I think—that it wasn’t covered under food stamps, because they often only found out at the register after already mixing it, often as a treat for their kids). You literally can’t walk into a gas station, grab one of those hot dogs off their grills/out of the little heated food area, and buy it with food stamps, because it’s hot.

And when I say “can’t,” I don’t mean “if the cashier notices you trying and cares enough to stop you, they’ll refuse to do it for you.” I mean “it is actually impossible to do this.” I’m not even sure these people who disseminate false information about food stamps have paid any attention at all when buying things at the store, because what happens is: We scan in the customer’s items, into our computer. The computer has specific codes for the items and rules for what it will let you pay for things with. We scan the customer’s EBT card, and it tells us exactly how much of that price total can be paid for via EBT, and it will not include anything that isn’t food, and it will not include anything considered “pre-prepared” food. It does this automatically AND THERE IS NO OVERRIDE FOR IT. If our machines say that you can’t use the EBT card to pay for something, there is literally nothing we can do to change that, even if we WANTED to.

So no. You can’t buy iPads or cigarettes with food stamps. You can’t withdraw money from casinos or anywhere else with food stamps. You can’t buy dog food with food stamps; sometimes you can’t even buy people food with food stamps. I’m not even sure if you can buy “the big chicken legs” at Disney with food stamps; remember, you can’t buy “any food sold for on-premises consumption” OR any hot foods, and that’s both.

Literally the only thing these fearmongers listed that you can actually purchase with food stamps even if you are in goddamn cahoots with the evil liberal cashier or store manager is soda, and the judgement against people buying that with food stamps is classist fuckwittery at its finest.

So, as always, Fox News is actually flat-out lying, and hateful conservatives both don’t know what they’re talking about and don’t give a fuck about people going through shit that they will never have to go through themselves, and that they in fact don’t have even the tiniest clue about (not even via five seconds’ research; a list of things that can’t be purchased with food stamps is on the Food and Nutrition Services website) but still think they should spout off about to their TV audience anyway.

and other ignorant people actually listen to them.

Living while white

When asking oneself, “Is that racist?”, think about having to explain it to friends who are of the group it’s about.

For example, if a coworker says, “The riots happened because in Their Culture, machismo is valued,” feel free to disagree on the basis of your humanity and intellect.

Omg this purple bike! Even the spokes are mauve!

Omg this purple bike! Even the spokes are mauve!

Purple bike’s owner thinks train is yoga studio

mountaindave:

strawberrypatty:

thepfa:

nohetero:

scottthepilgrim:

which fucking fedora wearing friendzoned nerd made this thing

yeah but notice that the seal’s intent is to eat those fish and the shark offers a mutually beneficial relationship for them
in which a dudebro unintentionally makes a really accurate analogy for the reason that they’re single forever

That’s a whale shark. They’re docile and in no way threatening to people or those fish depicted. Seals, by contrast, will attack people, possibly out of a frustrated sense of entitlement combined with poor socialization skills.

When analogies fail but then actually are super truthful.

I think someone needs to put a fedora on the seal

mountaindave:

strawberrypatty:

thepfa:

nohetero:

scottthepilgrim:

which fucking fedora wearing friendzoned nerd made this thing

yeah but notice that the seal’s intent is to eat those fish and the shark offers a mutually beneficial relationship for them

in which a dudebro unintentionally makes a really accurate analogy for the reason that they’re single forever

That’s a whale shark. They’re docile and in no way threatening to people or those fish depicted. Seals, by contrast, will attack people, possibly out of a frustrated sense of entitlement combined with poor socialization skills.

When analogies fail but then actually are super truthful.

I think someone needs to put a fedora on the seal